The Last Week. The Last Four Years.
On Saturday morning I heard fireworks outside. I've gotten very used to fireworks, but 8:30 am fireworks seemed odd. I knew something had happened. I turned on the news and heard The News. The election was called for Biden.
My partner was on a work call at the time so I took in the information alone. I went on Instagram - and shared my unsorted feelings with the internet. Then, I called my mom. As soon as I heard her voice, I fell apart gasping and crying. She asked me what was wrong and I said "I'm just overwhelmed...and relieved."
Some people reacted to the news with celebratory shouts, dancing in the streets, and honking their car horns. Other people - like me, reacted with tears, heaves, and shaking.
Have you seen the movie, Captain Phillips? Tom Hanks plays the stoic captain of a cargo ship that's overtaken by pirates who take him hostage and kill his shipmates. Throughout the film, Captain Phillips is calm, pragmatic, and cooperative. In the final swell of the film, the pirates are executed and Philips is abruptly extracted from the ship.
In a very powerful portrayal by Hanks, the next scene reveals Phillips in a holding room, sobbing uncontrollably. The response to moving out of sustained survival mode isn't joy. It's shock at the absence of immediate danger.
I didn't realize how much I had been holding in over the past week, and over the past four years. Staying outside of your feelings is a survival tactic in and of itself. I know this - I just didn't know that I was doing it.
So, on Monday morning, I am still in process - as are many of us.
I launched The Center for Women's Voice in the wake of the 2016 election and the disappointment, frustration, and urgency it stirred up in me. I was particularly moved by these words from Hillary Clinton's concession speech:
"And to all of the little girls who are watching this, never doubt that you are valuable and powerful and deserving of every chance and opportunity in the world to pursue and achieve your own dreams"
Four years ago exactly I shared Clinton’s quote on social media along with the following reflection:
This is the exhortation that I take to heart the most today. I'm not a little girl, but the little girl inside of me has had this thought in the form of a question for too long. At the age of 9 years old I wrote in my journal, "I'm black, I'm fat, I wear glasses, and I'm a girl...that's four counts against me." I have no recollection of what inspired that thought, but it was a statement of observation and not sorrow.
WE HAVE TO CHANGE THE NARRATIVE FOR THIS GENERATION OF WOMEN.
Women and men have to both agree and advocate that women and women's rights are worth protecting. Women and men have to both agree that sexual assault and predatory behavior towards anyone is unacceptable. Women and men have to both agree and communicate to our daughters, wives, partners, nieces, children, mothers, aunts, grandmothers, cousins, selves, that women are as valuable as men. No matter what.
How can we be unified when half of the population is not respected?
On Saturday, Kamala Harris said in her acceptance speech:
"...while I may be the first woman in this office, I won't be the last. Because every little girl watching tonight sees that this is a country of possibilities. And to the children of our country, regardless of your gender, our country has sent you a clear message: Dream with ambition, lead with conviction, and see yourself in a way that others might not see you, simply because they've never seen it before."
This message has more teeth now than it ever has before.
I am still in the process, but I know we are in a better place than we were a week ago, and four years ago.
I'm grateful for the work that I get to do alongside women who are changing the narratives in their lives and in the world.
I am grateful to you for supporting The Center for Women's Voice in this vision.
with love and respect,
Malika
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