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PERFECT LIES


I spent way too much time on this post. Why?


This is not how I planned to launch the Center for Women’s Voice blog.


I imagined cooler graphics, quotes with fancy fonts, a really big mailing list, and so much more.


Why? I don’t know.  I just wanted it to perfect. Before I put it out there in the world.


Does this sound familiar?


Perfect lies.


Perfect says that your best idea is just around the corner (or even worse, really far away). Perfect says that you should wait for the right day of the week/better weather/when you’re not so busy/ when you’ve got more followers/ when you’ve been promoted, and on and on. Perfect is delusional.


Your best idea is here, now. Today is the best day. You’re not too busy. You have exactly what you need.


Have you ever wanted to say something – share a comment in a meeting, offer a condolence to a loved one, inform your employer about a terrible situation at work – but you couldn’t figure out the best way to say it? So you thought about it for a bit…and then didn’t say anything at all? I’ve been there.


A very practical aspect of using our voice, begins with allowing it to be whatever it is. Communication, at the deepest level, is about connection not perfection. You will find the right words by saying them.


Where have you been holding back and waiting for the perfect words/timing/weather?  Whatever you need to say or do – You won’t feel ready. You could have prepared more. Other people may think you’re sloppy/reckless/naive/etc – they may judge your frivolous use of dashes. That’s fine. They’ll probably do it silently.


We have to start from somewhere, and move forward in whatever ways we can.


“If you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all” — forget that adage.  Well meaning, but seriously dated and not very effective for these times. Let’s do the next generation a favor and stop perpetuating that particular rule.
Here’s the new adage: “Just say something.”